Dealing With Failure When Everyone’s Watching by Allison Barron

Dealing With Failure When Everyone’s Watching

When ‘Mass Effect Andromeda’ Bombed, I Had to Rethink Humility by Allison Barron

Excerpts:

Watching a beloved video game franchise crash and burn challenged my gut reaction to disappointment.
… Being able to take constructive criticism is necessary to grow and improve—and it requires a healthy portion of humility with a heaping side of grace.
We are quick to reject someone else’s opinion when it differs from ours—especially if it involves a project in which we are emotionally invested.

Continue reading “Dealing With Failure When Everyone’s Watching by Allison Barron”

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How People Learn to Become Resilient by Maria Konnikova

If I am understanding this article correctly, one of its points is that it’s not what happens to you in life that can or will determine how you cope or if you succeed, but how you choose to view that thing or event, whatever it may be.

How People Learn to Become Resilient by Maria Konnikova, Feb 2016

Excerpts:

… Resilience presents a challenge for psychologists. Whether you can be said to have it or not largely depends not on any particular psychological test but on the way your life unfolds.

…Garmezy’s work [studying school children from abusive homes who yet went to to be successful] opened the door to the study of protective factors: the elements of an individual’s background or personality that could enable success despite the challenges they faced.

….Perhaps most importantly, the resilient children had what psychologists call an “internal locus of control”: they believed that they, and not their circumstances, affected their achievements.

The resilient children saw themselves as the orchestrators of their own fates.

Continue reading “How People Learn to Become Resilient by Maria Konnikova”

Why the Best Success Stories Often Begin With Failure by Amy Crawford

Why the Best Success Stories Often Begin With Failure by Amy Crawford

One writer’s unexpected bout of unemployment inspired him to catalogue the misadventures of those who came before him

Long before the iPhone made him the god of gadgets, Steve Jobs launched his tech career by hacking land lines to make free long-distance calls.

Bob Dylan’s band, the Golden Chords, lost a high-school talent competition to a tap dancing act.

Behind every success story is an embarrassing first effort, a stumble, a setback or a radical change of direction. It’s these first clumsy steps on the road to fame and fortune that fascinate writer Seth Fiegerman, who edits the blog OpeningLines.org, a collection of case studies on the origins of famous careers.

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Actor Chris O’Dowd is a Great Big Jerk – Not Adorable, Not Nice, and No, Not Sexy

Actor Chris O’Dowd is a Great Big Jerk

This post has been edited several times to add new links and commentary

And there’s an August 2017 follow-up here:

The Inconsistency of Actor Chris O’Dowd Regarding Religion – His 2017 Comments

And another here:

Blocked by Actor Chris O’Dowd on Twitter


I will say from the start this is going to be one very long post, though there is a TLDR (Too Long Didn’t Read) intro below.

I’ve never had a talent for being concise. This is something you may want to bookmark and read the rest later.

In a 2012 interview with GQ, which you can read here, actor Chris O’Dowd says:

“I don’t know, maybe there is something in female writing that I’m attracted to.”

Well, then, he should really love my blog posts about him.

(As of April 2017, I edited my last post about O’Dowd and his terrible movie role choices to toss in a few other things about the guy which annoy me – most of the new content is towards the bottom of that post. Don’t forget the other post I did where I dissected his low-key variety of sexism.)

The movie ‘Bridesmaids’ was first shown in movie theaters in the year 2011, but I did  not see it until I caught it for the first time on cable TV in spring or summer of 2015.

Sad Face Emoji In this movie, actor Chris O’Dowd played a nice guy named “Nathan Rhodes” who worked as a cop (a state trooper, specifically), and Kristen Wiig, who ended up being his love interest, played down-on-her-luck “Annie Walker.”

Actor Jon Hamm played the sexist creep dirt bag “Ted,” who was using Annie for sex.

This movie was more than just a movie for me when I saw it on TV in 2015. I saw this movie at a very low point in my life, and it helped to cheer me up – for a time, at least.


TLDR

Too Long, Didn’t Read summary:

I saw the ‘Bridesmaids’ movie on cable TV after undergoing (and still undergoing) some very upsetting events in my life, including the death of my mother, who was a very loving person and who was also a Republican and a devout Christian.

I found the ‘Bridesmaids’ movie encouraging at a low point in my life.

I wanted to learn more about the movie, and the people who made it and acted in it, so I did research about it on the internet, including interviews with actor Chris O’Dowd, who played the nice guy in the film (the role of the cop, Rhodes).

From what I saw, in real life, O’Dowd insults and ridicules Republicans and people of faith and concepts they believe in (such as prayer) on his Twitter account and in some interviews he’s given.

O’Dowd is into kind of vulgar or slightly sexist humor in real life, as well, which is a turn off to me – I prefer men who behave like gentlemen and who treat women with respect.

I was stunned and saddened to discover that the guy who played such a friendly, pleasant guy in the ‘Bridesmaids’ movie is, in real life, rather rude and condescending towards other people he doesn’t even know – specifically, he’s rude and insulting towards conservatives, Republicans, or theists.

One result of this is that I can no longer really enjoy watching the movie any more.

Aug 2017 update: I also predict, further below, that I wouldn’t be surprised if O’Dowd and his wife, Dawn, divorce in several years, because she’s basically living for weeks or months at a time like a single mother, raising their two sons alone, while he’s off jet-setting around the world filming movies and TV shows.


MY BACKGROUND

I’ll explain my background here, (and I’m sorry it’s going to be quite long), so you can understand my position better, before I state some of my grievances with O’Dowd much farther below, because my background plays a part in my disappointment with O’Dowd and some of the other people associated with this film.

MY MOM’S HEALTH

My mother died a few years before I saw the ‘Bridesmaids’ movie on television, and my mother’s death was the most painful and heart-breaking thing I’ve ever had to endure.

Continue reading “Actor Chris O’Dowd is a Great Big Jerk – Not Adorable, Not Nice, and No, Not Sexy”

Why the Fear of Rejection Overrides One’s Ability to Ask for What They Want or Need

Why the Fear of Rejection Overrides One’s Ability to Ask for What They Want or Need

In “The Terror of a No“, the ever-insightful School of Life addresses through animation by Simon Biggs, an all too common problem in which the fear of rejection so disables a person’s confidence that they cannot ask for what they want or need, leaving them lacking on so many fronts.

…not asking is not cost free. We are avoiding the pain of rejection; but we are settling for something that is more insidious and troubling: a lack of opportunity. Not asking life for something means implicitly asking it for something else, failure from the outset. And this is especially sad because life is so very short. What we should really be scared of is not a ‘no’, but of reaching our deathbeds unfulfilled. We should ask.

Watch and listen to the video here:


See Also:

You’re Not Failing Enough, by Diane Paddison

Nay-Sayers and Failure on the Way to Success: Singer Elvis Presley

Best-Sellers Initially Rejected

Become More Resilient by Learning to Take Joy Seriously by Brad Stulberg

How People Learn to Become Resilient by Maria Konnikova

How Successful People Stay Calm by Travis Bradberry

Songs – Motivational and Encouraging (a list with embedded You Tube videos)

This Man Read 2000 Obituaries in a Year and Here’s What he Learned

Why the Best Success Stories Often Begin With Failure by Amy Crawford

Best-Sellers Initially Rejected

Forget Positive Thinking: This Is How To Actually Change Negative Thoughts For Success by M. Wilding

After 27 Rejections, Dr. Seuss Almost Burned His First Unpublished Book – But He Hung In There and Went on to Become a Best-Selling Author

Liberal Feminist Celebrities: It’s Not Feminist of You to Scold Women For How They Voted

There have been a number of left wing, celebrity feminists who have shamed or scolded American women (in particular, white women) for how they voted in the 2016 American Presidential elections.

I don’t find it very “feminist” for women to shame other women for whom they voted for! To shame women for how they voted, to cluck disapprovingly at them for how they voted, is rather patronizing and it infantilizes grown women.

I personally did not vote for any one in the 2016 elections (because I did not like any of the candidates who ran), but I’m not about to scold or insult women for how they voted, if they did.

The most recent liberal celebrity to shame women for whom they cast a vote is comedian Tina Fey. She seems quite likable apart from this incident, so this is disappointing.

Actress Lena Dunham and singer Madonna have also shamed or condescendingly lectured women in the last few months over their choice of candidate.

It is not the place for one American woman to call out another American woman for how she voted. I find it especially annoying when this criticism comes out of the mouths of these multi-millionaire movie actors or singers and other entertainers who do not have all or even most of the same concerns as middle class, or lower class, or working class Americans…

Here are links about this (stories covering Tina Fey, Madonna, and Lena Dunham):

Tina Fey to White Women Who Voted for President Trump: ‘It’s Going to Affect You Eventually’ 

Tina Fey calls out the college-educated white women who voted for Trump

Tina Fey warns female Trump voters: His election will come back to haunt you

Tina Fey Blasts White Female Trump Voters: ‘You Can’t Look Away’

Tina Fey to white college-educated women: ‘You can’t look away’ 

Tina Fey calls out white women who voted Trump

Tina Fey Scolds College-Educated Women Who Voted For Trump (Or This Is Why You Lost Part VII)

Excerpts:

These people [liberals, especially liberal celebrities] still don’t get it. You lost because partially because no one likes being what to do, especially when it comes to voting. You called Trump supporters deplorable.

You’re smug. You’re condescending. And that usually doesn’t yield dividends.

You lost. Hillary sucked.

And you’re stuck with Trump for the next four, possibly eight years.

Continue reading “Liberal Feminist Celebrities: It’s Not Feminist of You to Scold Women For How They Voted”

Forget Positive Thinking: This Is How To Actually Change Negative Thoughts For Success by M. Wilding

Forget Positive Thinking: This Is How To Actually Change Negative Thoughts For Success by Melody Wilding

Excerpts:

…The problem with positive affirmations is that they operate at the surface level of conscious thinking and do nothing to contend with the subconscious mind where limiting beliefs really live.

…The truth is that it’s natural and healthy to experience a range of feelings, including less pleasant ones like disappointment, sadness or guilt. While there’s no question that ruminating in negative emotions can turn toxic, whitewashing your insecurities with positive thinking is merely a temporary fix.

…Unreasonably optimistic thinking can trigger a self-defeating spiral, particularly for those prone to anxiety and depression. Research shows that while repeating positive self-statements may benefit people with high self-regard, it can backfire for those lacking confidence.

Continue reading “Forget Positive Thinking: This Is How To Actually Change Negative Thoughts For Success by M. Wilding”